He's stuck in the wheelchair Milla acquired and has been brought back to his house, where she'll be in the background, observing so that he doesn't get killed after all.
The fear affliction's still there-- the moment he hears anyone approach, he startles, glancing over quickly with his eyes wide, and says nothing.]
[A shake of his head, there, as he shrinks from her; that anger absolutely doesn't help how he's feeling. Four is going to have a great time this weekend.]
...it's as I said before. I know she'd have killed me eventually. I had to remove her first, get myself paired with someone else, but I-- it was too big a risk to kill her outright.
[the anger gets results, at least. he does not want more broken limbs.]
There'd be fewer bodies if she were voted for instead. Less risk of just dying partnerless, that way.
Her memory. I saw her-- she was killing a large number of people. Strange vehicles knocked out of the air, all of them screaming-- she was enjoying it. They deserved it.
[Describing it makes a shudder run through him, and he shakes his head to clear it.]
And the time in trial, when she touched me... in that one she was so angry. She wanted to tear her own sister apart, nothing would have stopped her from doing it to me, especially if she were corrupt-- she saw my memories. She knew too much of me.
[...he's all too glad to move on from those thoughts, with how they seem to just feed the fear.]
...but I won't live now, regardless. I knew as soon as he exposed me. The horse wasn't even fully at fault and he's dead, what chance do I have?
So your decision was to be a coward and murder someone you knew wouldn't have an option to fight back.
[She pauses.]
Who were you working with? I know who you spoke with on the week Kazuaki died, so don't lie or I'll know. Was it Hisoka? Is that where the seed came from?
[even with this fear, he doesn't do things like that when he has no reason for it.
there's a long moment of silence before he exhales raggedly.]
I wasn't entirely lying, with what I said to you. I can't trust anyone here entirely. But I intended to keep your secrets. I was asked to at least-- try to trust others here.
[a nervous little huff of a laugh follows, entirely humorless.]
I suppose I shouldn't have listened. I don't suppose any of you should've listened to me.
And what even is the right thing, now? Killing me? Letting me live just so I may be killed later-- keeping me here so I can be gotten rid of when it's convenient?
I'm not a fool, Emma, I know I won't live long.
[....even so.]
I don't--
[-want to die. He just finishes with another shake of his head.]
[It's the fear talking, really-- normally he wouldn't be this open, but damn, getting both legs broken and being kind of terrified of everyone really does work wonders.]
...Emma. Tell me something. Were you with them?
[Someone mentioned it worked, after Axel exposed him-- there must have been an effort.]
I suppose you don't know that, any more than I know you weren't working against me. What would you even threaten me with to prevent that, at this point...?
[...a pause, there, another shaky inhale.]
I've never had anything to lose. All you have is my word, and I don't know if it's worth keeping, now.
[but it doesn't sound like a threat. he just sounds uncertain.]
[that-- gets another humorless laugh after a moment, fingers combing restlessly through his hair as he lets his head fall into one of his hands.]
You know the position I'm in-- do you really think I'm not?
[He doesn't feel smart, he just feels kind of terrified at all times and extremely paranoid. He wants to think she was involved. He wants to think she wasn't.
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w3, post-trial
He's stuck in the wheelchair Milla acquired and has been brought back to his house, where she'll be in the background, observing so that he doesn't get killed after all.
The fear affliction's still there-- the moment he hears anyone approach, he startles, glancing over quickly with his eyes wide, and says nothing.]
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How's your leg feeling?
[They aren't partners, but it's not hard to almost feel the fury from the way she's looking at him.]
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...as you'd expect.
[they fucking hurt, basically.]
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[She glances towards Milla wherever she stands for just a second, before looking back his way.]
Let's make this quick. Why?
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[the anger gets results, at least. he does not want more broken limbs.]
There'd be fewer bodies if she were voted for instead. Less risk of just dying partnerless, that way.
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[...]
Why did you try to kill Lea? How did that fit into your whole not dying plan?
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[Describing it makes a shudder run through him, and he shakes his head to clear it.]
And the time in trial, when she touched me... in that one she was so angry. She wanted to tear her own sister apart, nothing would have stopped her from doing it to me, especially if she were corrupt-- she saw my memories. She knew too much of me.
[...he's all too glad to move on from those thoughts, with how they seem to just feed the fear.]
...but I won't live now, regardless. I knew as soon as he exposed me. The horse wasn't even fully at fault and he's dead, what chance do I have?
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[She pauses.]
Who were you working with? I know who you spoke with on the week Kazuaki died, so don't lie or I'll know. Was it Hisoka? Is that where the seed came from?
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[He's dead, now. There's no point in avoiding it. He's exposed, they may as well both be.]
The seed was his. We were to cover for each other-- I never needed to do it for him.
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[...]
Are you going to tell anyone now? Keep in mind that if anyone who I haven't personally told knows, I will know it was you.
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[even with this fear, he doesn't do things like that when he has no reason for it.
there's a long moment of silence before he exhales raggedly.]
I wasn't entirely lying, with what I said to you. I can't trust anyone here entirely. But I intended to keep your secrets. I was asked to at least-- try to trust others here.
[a nervous little huff of a laugh follows, entirely humorless.]
I suppose I shouldn't have listened. I don't suppose any of you should've listened to me.
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[She looks like there’s something else she wants to say, but she lets it pass.]
And everyone can trust most of us to do the right thing.
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I'm not a fool, Emma, I know I won't live long.
[....even so.]
I don't--
[-want to die. He just finishes with another shake of his head.]
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You don’t what?
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[He exhales a slow, ragged breath, still a little shaky; his fingers curl into the fabric of his pants.]
I can't get them back if I die. I can't ensure I live at home if I die.
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[...]
I don't have a way to make sure you're safe. If you want something like that, you should be talking to Lune or Sol.
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[It's the fear talking, really-- normally he wouldn't be this open, but damn, getting both legs broken and being kind of terrified of everyone really does work wonders.]
...Emma. Tell me something. Were you with them?
[Someone mentioned it worked, after Axel exposed him-- there must have been an effort.]
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...If I said no, would you even believe me?
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[He can be honest about that much, at least.]
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How am I supposed to trust that you won't decide even not being sure is incentive to tell everyone?
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[...a pause, there, another shaky inhale.]
I've never had anything to lose. All you have is my word, and I don't know if it's worth keeping, now.
[but it doesn't sound like a threat. he just sounds uncertain.]
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You aren't stupid. Do you think I was?
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You know the position I'm in-- do you really think I'm not?
[He doesn't feel smart, he just feels kind of terrified at all times and extremely paranoid. He wants to think she was involved. He wants to think she wasn't.
God, this is messing with his head.]
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moves this under here oops
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